"July Member" Unisex Garment-Dyed Tee
Black / S
$30.99
Sale price
$30.99
Regular price
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You've officially given up pretending you enjoy summer. The heat index is threatening your will to live, the pavement is melting, and your only loyalty is to whoever keeps the thermostat at 68. Welcome to July — population: you, a lawn chair, and a cold water bottle. This design features a contentedly chubby dude in shorts and a cap, reclined on a lounge chair at a cool 110°F, reading a book called Cooling Tactics while fountains splash dramatically around him. He's not suffering. He's strategizing. Bold text underneath reads: JULY MEMBER — I'M JUST HERE FOR THE A/C. It's the official uniform of anyone whose summer survival plan begins and ends with climate control. Why customers love it: Perfectly captures the heat-avoidance lifestyle without any apology whatsoever The "Cooling Tactics" book detail is a chef's kiss of self-aware lazy genius Relatable to literally anyone who's ever walked outside in July and immediately regretted it Makes a hilarious gift for the friend who complains about the heat every single year Bold, easy-to-read text means your anti-summer stance is visible from across the parking lot Perfect for: Summer BBQs you didn't want to attend • Office thermostat wars • July birthday gifts • Anyone living in Arizona, Texas, or the actual sun You didn't choose the air-conditioned life — the air-conditioned life chose you. Wisely.
"July Member" Unisex Garment-Dyed Tee
$30.99
Sale price
$30.99
Regular price
| S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL | 4XL | |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Width, in | 18.25 | 20.25 | 22.00 | 24.00 | 26.00 | 27.75 | 29.75 |
| Length, in | 26.62 | 28.00 | 29.37 | 30.75 | 31.62 | 32.50 | 33.50 |
| Sleeve length from center back, in | 16.25 | 17.75 | 19.00 | 20.50 | 21.75 | 23.25 | 24.63 |
| Size tolerance, in | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |
The fabric: Comfort Colors 1717 — 100% ring-spun cotton, garment-dyed for a soft, lived-in feel that gets better with every wash. Relaxed unisex fit. Available in sizes S–4XL.