{"product_id":"instructions-unclear-premium-graphic-tee","title":"\"Instructions Unclear\" Premium Graphic Tee","description":"\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width:360px;\"\u003e\n \u003cthead\u003e\n \u003ctr\u003e\n \u003cth style=\"padding:10px;\"\u003e\u003c\/th\u003e\n \u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e3XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e4XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n \u003c\/tr\u003e\n \u003c\/thead\u003e\n \u003ctbody\u003e\n \n \u003ctr\u003e\n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n Width, in\n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 18.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 20.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 22.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 24.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 26.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 28.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 30.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003c\/tr\u003e\n \n \u003ctr\u003e\n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n Length, in\n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 28.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 29.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 30.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 31.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 32.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 33.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 34.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003c\/tr\u003e\n \n \u003ctr\u003e\n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n Sleeve length (from center back), in\n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 15.10 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 16.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 18.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 19.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 21.00 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 22.40 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 23.70 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003c\/tr\u003e\n \n \u003ctr\u003e\n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n Size tolerance, in\n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 1.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 1.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 1.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 1.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 1.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 1.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n 1.50 \n \u003c\/td\u003e\n \n \u003c\/tr\u003e\n \n \u003c\/tbody\u003e\n \u003c\/table\u003e\n \u003cp\u003eYou picked up the manual on being human, skimmed the table of contents, and now you're just winging it with a slightly confused expression and a desperate need for caffeine. Congratulations — you are exactly the target audience for this shirt. We see you out there, functioning at roughly 60% capacity and making it look almost intentional. This design lays it all out in three brutally relatable steps: Step 1, hold the human mask you're supposed to wear in public. Step 2, attempt to put it on correctly (spoiler: the arrows suggest it goes everywhere at once). Step 3, give up and stare into the void with a question mark hovering over your head. Bold text below delivers the verdict: HUMANING: INSTRUCTIONS UNCLEAR. SEND COFFEE. It's equal parts existential crisis and morning routine — and somehow that's the most honest thing anyone has said all week. Why customers love it: Captures the exact feeling of adulting when nobody actually explained the rules The three-step diagram format is instantly funny because everyone recognizes the failure sequence \"Send coffee\" is a universal SOS that needs zero explanation Dry, deadpan humor that's clever without trying too hard — the best kind Starts conversations with the only people worth talking to: other confused humans who also need coffee Perfect for: Monday mornings • office coffee runs • gift for the friend who's barely holding it together • anyone who adulted today and deserves a medal Results may vary. Instructions remain unclear. Coffee is non-negotiable.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e Gildan 5000 heavyweight cotton — sturdy build that holds its shape wash after wash. This premium version features a full back print, a left sleeve accent, and a subtle interior neck label — front is left clean for an understated look. Available in sizes S–4XL.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Tennessee Orange \/ S","offer_id":52109927514408,"sku":"30648269075109058815","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ S","offer_id":52109927547176,"sku":"34008071013048503555","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Garnet \/ S","offer_id":52109927579944,"sku":"18901906410551548977","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Sapphire \/ S","offer_id":52109927612712,"sku":"27788089346329777041","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ S","offer_id":52109927645480,"sku":"69677534472565294194","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ S","offer_id":52109927678248,"sku":"32261832605464934115","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":52109927711016,"sku":"27841958245579570574","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":52109927743784,"sku":"61562609925647610199","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gold \/ S","offer_id":52109927776552,"sku":"32964668547996085410","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Indigo Blue \/ S","offer_id":52109927809320,"sku":"11717488037940539128","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ S","offer_id":52109927842088,"sku":"18095282442636282385","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Tennessee Orange \/ M","offer_id":52109927874856,"sku":"32249609337668808937","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ M","offer_id":52109927907624,"sku":"28072283932116847789","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Garnet \/ M","offer_id":52109927940392,"sku":"16445742809758795303","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Sapphire \/ M","offer_id":52109927973160,"sku":"26680672493110946757","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ M","offer_id":52109928005928,"sku":"24778541165524447766","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ M","offer_id":52109928038696,"sku":"31284935027867500020","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ M","offer_id":52109928071464,"sku":"20416546932593254010","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ M","offer_id":52109928104232,"sku":"10455748672790593527","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gold \/ M","offer_id":52109928137000,"sku":"20191837763006207702","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Indigo Blue \/ M","offer_id":52109928169768,"sku":"29016279698613541356","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ M","offer_id":52109928202536,"sku":"40814258669995115484","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Tennessee Orange \/ L","offer_id":52109928235304,"sku":"11995249544910176774","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ L","offer_id":52109928268072,"sku":"63195856569770779557","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Garnet \/ L","offer_id":52109928300840,"sku":"28426979428441585554","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Sapphire \/ L","offer_id":52109928333608,"sku":"17057596239870450161","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ L","offer_id":52109928366376,"sku":"13668125192725690968","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ L","offer_id":52109928399144,"sku":"94115745294643874928","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ L","offer_id":52109928431912,"sku":"22864769284747426658","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ L","offer_id":52109928464680,"sku":"24071298983647395831","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gold \/ L","offer_id":52109928497448,"sku":"15042664521035002422","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Indigo Blue \/ L","offer_id":52109928530216,"sku":"11072969748253925197","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ L","offer_id":52109928562984,"sku":"92961397459376475276","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Tennessee Orange \/ XL","offer_id":52109928595752,"sku":"26075354961046085481","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ XL","offer_id":52109928628520,"sku":"16647402804604726297","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Garnet \/ XL","offer_id":52109928661288,"sku":"18783010786643536868","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Sapphire \/ XL","offer_id":52109928694056,"sku":"22845013128507178106","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ XL","offer_id":52109928726824,"sku":"18928288522501489504","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ XL","offer_id":52109928759592,"sku":"14370259912027628352","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ XL","offer_id":52109928792360,"sku":"20726727000276424975","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ XL","offer_id":52109928825128,"sku":"90557077853321781848","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gold \/ XL","offer_id":52109928857896,"sku":"30159516302095078294","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Indigo Blue \/ XL","offer_id":52109928890664,"sku":"28029688628210540423","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ XL","offer_id":52109928923432,"sku":"22871779907857660881","price":32.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Tennessee Orange \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109928956200,"sku":"12667770163882300370","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109928988968,"sku":"11174259981860624795","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Garnet \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929021736,"sku":"92539270133042593540","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Sapphire \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929054504,"sku":"62991815019740865075","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929087272,"sku":"27359701563752990512","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929120040,"sku":"25310263493974340981","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929152808,"sku":"15961176149641497671","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929185576,"sku":"31907300443378749869","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gold \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929218344,"sku":"26976876119573474653","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Indigo Blue \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929251112,"sku":"29956443135098394208","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 2XL","offer_id":52109929283880,"sku":"32620547123332678391","price":35.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Tennessee Orange \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929316648,"sku":"27707369963066285074","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929349416,"sku":"13119828375106910757","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Garnet \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929382184,"sku":"13231704701337737356","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Sapphire \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929414952,"sku":"94809207435786909435","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929447720,"sku":"29158764336379811661","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929480488,"sku":"31524021752333901270","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929513256,"sku":"28477192014463678552","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929546024,"sku":"10387526121116991168","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gold \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929578792,"sku":"30032527076799051775","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Indigo Blue \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929611560,"sku":"73483841063005557906","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 3XL","offer_id":52109929644328,"sku":"16831242704533052315","price":37.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Tennessee Orange \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929677096,"sku":"10013130717773753485","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Carolina Blue \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929709864,"sku":"51908072459749681231","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Garnet \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929742632,"sku":"28921329725446265946","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Heather Sapphire \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929775400,"sku":"19315762322262912003","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Light Blue \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929808168,"sku":"14201193743297954860","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Natural \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929840936,"sku":"12521532171780247986","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Red \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929873704,"sku":"29498886995135018874","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929906472,"sku":"95199260479629652921","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Gold \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929939240,"sku":"15621025153216924532","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Indigo Blue \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109929972008,"sku":"31988828656473780100","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Military Green \/ 4XL","offer_id":52109930004776,"sku":"14978629540717443698","price":39.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0985\/5248\/0040\/files\/3706319520985198131_2048.jpg?v=1784136828","url":"https:\/\/www.attitudeshirts.com\/products\/instructions-unclear-premium-graphic-tee","provider":"Attitude Shirts","version":"1.0","type":"link"}