{"product_id":"im-a-good-boy-tank-top","title":"\"I'm A Good Boy\" Tank Top","description":"\u003ctable id=\"size-guide\" style=\"min-width:360px;\"\u003e\n            \u003cthead\u003e\n                \u003ctr\u003e\n                    \u003cth style=\"padding:10px;\"\u003e\u003c\/th\u003e\n                    \u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eS\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eM\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003eXL\u003c\/th\u003e\n\u003cth style=\"color:#000000;font-weight:500;text-align:left;font-size:15px;padding:10px;\"\u003e2XL\u003c\/th\u003e\n                \u003c\/tr\u003e\n            \u003c\/thead\u003e\n            \u003ctbody\u003e\n                \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Width, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            18.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            20.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            22.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            24.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            26.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Length, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            28.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            29.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            30.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            31.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            32.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n                    \u003ctr\u003e\n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            Size tolerance, in\n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                        \u003ctd style=\"padding:10px;color:#525252;font-size:15px;border-top:1px solid #ededed;word-break: break-word;\"\u003e\n                            1.00 \n                        \u003c\/td\u003e\n                                        \n                    \u003c\/tr\u003e\n               \n            \u003c\/tbody\u003e\n        \u003c\/table\u003e\n        You sit. You stay. You come when called. Honestly, you're killing it — way better behaved than most people you know. This one's for everyone who follows the rules just well enough to seem innocent... but that smirk says otherwise.\nA cartoon dog with a retro color palette — teal, rust, golden tan, and cream — sits upright in perfect \"good boy\" form, collar on, tail up, wearing the most suspiciously smug grin you've ever seen on a four-legged creature. Below it, the commands every obedient pup knows: I sit. I stay. I cum. The joke lands exactly where it's supposed to. The dog knew what it was doing the whole time.\nWhy people love it:\n\n\nThe Setup: Starts completely innocent — a well-trained dog, a classic command list — then the punchline hits like a screen door in a hurricane.\n\nSmug Cartoon Energy: That sideways grin isn't accidental. This dog knows exactly what it said and has zero regrets.\n\nRetro Illustration Style: Vintage-toned artwork with a sticker-style outline gives this design serious personality beyond just the joke.\n\nDouble Take Guaranteed: People read the first two lines nodding along — then the third line makes them do a full stop and re-read it.\n\nUnapologetic Wit: Bold, a little crude, completely confident — exactly the energy for someone who doesn't shy away from a well-timed adult joke.\n\n\nPerfect for: dog lovers with a dirty sense of humor • gag gifts for friends who have heard it all • anyone who loves a slow-burn punchline • the person at the party who always goes there\nGood boys follow commands. Great ones know which ones to brag about.\u003cp\u003e\u003cstrong\u003eThe fabric:\u003c\/strong\u003e Gildan 5200 heavy cotton tank top — classic sleeveless fit for warm weather. Front print only.\u003c\/p\u003e","brand":"Printify","offers":[{"title":"Red \/ S","offer_id":67854312243496,"sku":"37135346215200452287","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Royal \/ S","offer_id":67854312276264,"sku":"98208838170826330425","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Sport Grey \/ S","offer_id":67854312309032,"sku":"17606497607253210340","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"White \/ S","offer_id":67854312341800,"sku":"12500759199703364535","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Maroon \/ S","offer_id":67854312374568,"sku":"24652924902571678227","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Purple \/ S","offer_id":67854312407336,"sku":"12841400625105412726","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Safety Pink \/ S","offer_id":67854312440104,"sku":"60904976494948547077","price":24.99,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Forest 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